Bleak Friday 2013-W48

Yesterday I read news of a mobster being fed to pigs by a rival gang.  Not sure when.  Being that they're animals, the pigs devoured him alive, undeterred by his shrieks (while they lasted).  Sorry for the horrifying imagery.  I also read the usual and customary stories about Black Friday shoppers and their behaviors.  Which reminded me of the first story, the one with the pigs.  Except I think the pigs come off a little better, especially as compared with one disgusting shopper I read about.

I struggled with whether and how to relate her story.  In brief, she ate a very hearty dinner on Thursday but must have forgotten that what goes in must eventually come out.  Thus early on Friday, while her part of the checkout line was still all the way back in Large Appliances, she needed to use the restroom.  Unwilling to lose her place in line, she used the clothes dryer next to her to evacuate her bowels.  That's correct.  P**ped.  Right there in the store, while in line, in a dryer.

A decade ago, the Black Friday phenomenon was a curiosity.  A relatively harmless freak show that I felt one should avoid witnessing first hand.  But in recent years, as the hype ratchets ever higher and behaviors become more extreme, Black Friday has become for me (and many) a disgusting spectacle that shows the worse side of humanity and our consumer culture.

The biggest irony is, almost none of the Black Friday "sales" are true bargains.  Retailers merely jack up the original price.  You end up paying the same amount that you paid a decade ago, but you've been tricked into believing you "saved" more.  Think about that while you struggle with the traffic and the crowds and the craziness and wait in line to buy yet another thing.  Wouldn't it be great if, instead of giving someone yet another thing, you found a way to give them a wonderful experience to remember?

Ah well, sorry for some of the images this posting may have conjured up for you today.  Let's cleanse your brain with this adorable kitten in a sock.  While you enjoy that, I'm not sure how I'll spend the rest of today...  I finished my Christmas shopping two days before Thanksgiving!

Kittybauble

Tom Turkey: In Memorium 2013-W47

After a spell of whattopaintitis, I recovered sufficiently to settle on a portrait of a noble bird that might well have been one of our national symbols instead of the eagle.  Tough break.  Instead of soaring majestically in election year commercials and appearing on things like money and our national seal, the turkey occupies a low-level ubiquity most of the year, only to be elevated to center stage on Thanksgiving Day.

Two observations and a story to follow:  let's start with one observation.  Turkey is terrible.  Not much flavor to speak of, and a disagreeable texture.  In my opinion, but an opinion which is shared by many.  Also, how does that bird stay so dry even when it is served in a liquid like chili?

A dozen years ago, I consulted over several months with a company that housed much of its workforce in a large office complex north of Hartford, on the Connecticut-Massachusetts border.  The place was a solid 20 minutes away from everything.  Management therefore had wisely endowed the complex with a lot of conveniences in a bid to keep people on the premises over their lunch hour.  Convenience store, health club, dry cleaner drop off, even a shoe repair service!  And an excellent cafeteria...  restaurant quality food if you asked me.  Early during my tenure, I was walking across the complex around 11am when I observed at least three dozen people queued for the cafeteria opening.  Turned out it wasn't a one-time phenomenon.

Every Wednesday by 11, people would be lined up early for Turkey.  And all the trimmings.  To me, it was shocking that people would line up for first crack at a meal that I was happy to eat once a year.  A meal that they could —and evidently did— eat every week!  Crazy.   And p.s., there was plenty of turkey and et cetera still being served every Wednesday at 1pm when I went to lunch.  I just don't get that obsession.  When I was young, turkey wasn't so common and thus it was kind of a big deal the one time a year when you did see it.  In retrospect, I think we savored the idea of a rare treat rather than its actual and tenuous flavor.  Maybe that's what drove those workers to their Wednesday queue.

Meanwhile, this Thanksgiving, I'll be eating a shredded Turkey from a Puerto Rican restaurant (better, still not great).  Although it's been a year with much sadness for my family, I still realize how very fortunate I am and how many things I have to be thankful for.  And while I'm taking a moment to be grateful, I'll be busy shovelling stuffing into my mouth because let's face it, that's what Thanksgiving dinner is really all about.

I hope your bird is moist-ish, your stuffing delicious; and all the other side dishes: may they be plentiful and at least warm if not hot.  I hope, as you give thanks, that you sit in the company of friends and family.  And most of all, I hope you have the good sense to relax at home on (especially) Thursday & Friday... instead of joining a frenzy of crazed shoppers fighting over the same crappy sale items as last year.  Happy Thanksgiving!

Turkey Lurkey

Rerun 2013-W46

I was unproductive at Salon so I went way back to mid-November of 2010 for a painting to show you today.

When we first started up Salon deWinchester, I hadn't painted for five months.  No surprise to find myself a little rusty; I undertook the first few Salon works as warmups — not good-paperworthy.  About a month in, I confidently busted out the very best paper for the painting below.  If mypetchicken.com is to be believed, he's an Old English Game Cock though I did use my artistic license on some of his coloring.  He was followed by several paintings which you can now see in my gallery as the Cats in Hats & Wigs series.

But back to our rooster friend, I still like to look at this painting and what's more, I like to reflect on how much I enjoyed the experience of making him and the cats.  I once read somewhere that happiness isn't something you experience, it's something you remember.  I'll think about that another time... right now I'd like to relax and turn control over to my birdbrain.

The Duke of Edinburgh

Calm Beforehand 2013-W45

I just practiced some figure sketches so Salon deWinchester (check out the art there) was relaxing today.  Yesterday morning I paused to reflect on how this week has been a bit of a lull.  No celebrity hysteria. No looming crises of government, no big news stories gripping the nation.  We had no elections or referendums in Chicago.  A couple of overcast and cool days.  All in all, not much happening.  And I like it! 

In two weeks time we'll head into Thanksgiving week and the crazy toboggan ride that is the holiday season.  I try to dodge much of the madness but even so it cannot be entirely avoided for 8 solid weeks.  I'll have a couple of airport journeys to navigate and several nights on a very cold air mattress...  in all a fair trade to spend Christmastime with some of my family.  Way before that, I will have gotten my (only two nephews to buy for) shopping done early after which I do my darnedest to just enjoy the fellowship and goodwill of the season.

As I often write in cards, I wish you a peaceful holiday season.  Although personally, I'm hedging my bet and making the most of the peaceful moments we're having now!
 

figure sketches

It's "Picture" Dammit 2013-W44

Ask most people to name that book/film where the guy stays young while up in the attic a painting shows him growing old and in decay, they will answer without hesitation The Portrait of Dorian Gray.  But, it's The Picture of Dorian Gray...  hope you didn't make it a true Daily Double!  They say there are no new jokes, just the same three jokes being eternally retold.  I suspect the same is true of many elements in Western Culture including narratives — so you have to credit Oscar Wilde (in his only novel) for coming up with a completely original concept for our soul-selling Mr. Gray.

In contrast to Wilde's memorable story, in Chicago our Halloween was not exactly one to remember...  cold and rainy all day.  Just a couple trick-or-treaters made their way up my porch steps and consequently I have a lot of mini tootsie-pops to get rid of.  I'll solve that riddle later.  While we're still in the afterglow of Halloween and the delayed-until-tonight parties, I thought it might be fun to paint myself as Dorian in the manner of the most famous version of his portrait.

It hangs in the Art Institute of Chicago, by Ivan Albright from the 1945 film, and it's quite a painting to behold.  Interestingly, the uncorrupted original was made by Henrique Medina, then as filming progressed Albright overpainted the decay and corruption elements to produce the final work we know today.  Fun fact:  for a time his daughter-in-law was former Secretary of State Madeleine Albright.  Who knew?

Soon into the event of painting, I realized it would take a lot of work to end up with something Albright-like.  Ultimately what I got is not Mr. Gray but some aging zombie hipster, which nevertheless gives critical mass to a new series that I look forward to extending each Halloween.  And hey, with my fact-filled posting today you could possibly win up to 4 different bar bets; I conveniently highlighted them for you...  please have a boo-tiful weekend!

Paintbox of Horror IV:  Hey Dude, Got Any Brains?